BlogIssues

2007 has definitely not been Britney’s year. Quite frankly I think she doesn’t even know how to spell the word “talent” nor could I care less about her but yet cannot deny that I enjoy reading about her escapades. Some of the things she has come out with this year are just beyond stupidity. What exactly has she achieved in 2007? Well she proudly earned herself the label of drugging and boozing lunatic with no sense of responsibility or parenthood. Milestones of the downfall of what once was one of the world’s most marketable and talentless teeny pop icons:

Jan-2007:

• Kicking off the New Year looking slutty: While black is favorable when you’ve just had kids, it doesn’t look like it works well on Britney.

• Spears quietly checked into Sanctuary, a spa in Arizona, on New Year’s Day, according to Life & Style weekly, blaming “exhaustion”.
• After exposing her bare ladyparts to the world and impending divorce proceedings, the pop tart really started to slip into wild partying spinning out of control. Just one of many reported incidents:

Britney was spottet coming out of the Italian restaurant Dolce in West Hollywood, appearing bloated and haggard. As she walked out, the newly minted party animal repeated, “I love myself, I love myself.”

• Britney Spears and K-Fed mutually agreed to a joint custody arrangement for the month of January. The world started feeling sorry for her kids, especially when reading about Britney roaring “into Vegas and she drops in unexpectedly at the Rio for Prince’s midnight show. She arrives with a partying posse of 20 friends, including her new beaufriend, Isaac Cohen, a model/actor who could be mistaken as a semi lookalike for her former hubby Kevin Federline.” and Britney “leading her group, including her male dancers, into the gay nightclub 8 1/2 for the shocking and scandalous out-of-control HustlaBall” As if her erratic behavior wasn’t already causing enough uproar, rumors of Britney being pregnant also began to circulate, luckily turned out not to be true.

Feb,2007:

• So it seemed like Britney was finally making a bit of effort and flew Vegas to work on a new album and continue to party hard. However, she stunned people with what appeared to be a smart move at the time, entering rehab. But that didn’t last very long, the shocking news for February was

Britney shaving her head bald.

  Within 24 hours the whole world knew that Britney Spears was bald. May as well make money with the shocking news, thought the hair salon and auctioned of Brit’s hair on ebay.

March,2007:

• After a short trip to rehab, Britney was soon loose again and checking back in for a third time, also continuing to show off her insanity. Free at last…

May,2007:

• Britney briefly returns to the stage a couple times, shouldn’t have done so. It became pretty clear that a whole lot of people became really tired of her.

June,2007:

• In June she was up to some sh#t like dressing as A Socialite’s Life so gracefully put it, “like a blind woman who likes the feeling of the wind on her nipples”, realizing she cannot sing and falling out with her mom real bad.

July,2007:

• Still feuding and slapping it out with Lynn Spears and pregnancy rumors returned once again. Also worth mentioning, “ Spears allegedly fled a (photo-) shoot wearing $12,861 worth of jewelry, a $974 Vera Wang dress, $380 Lanvin heels and a $281 Pucci scarf. When the clothes she ruined are added, the total comes to $21,267.”

August,2007:

• Britney hooked up with an extra on the set of her video, the custody battle was still going strong and she was hoping for a great comeback performance at the VMAS. Sometimes all you can do is hope, hoping this story is true and the footage will leak onto YouTube: The National Enquirer claimed there is camera footage of Britney beating K-Fed with a frying pan during their marriage.
• You do not need to watch the news or read the latest gossip columns to know that Britney Spears has been a pathetic  and shocking example of motherhood. Her kids would be better off being raised by a goat herd in my opinion. You know, telling them they were mistakes, drinking in front of them and running around naked in front of them. The Star reported: “What those affidavits allegedly reveal about Britney and how she treats Sean Preston, 23 months, and Jayden James, 11 months — including ranting “You were both mistakes!” at the tots — are shocking and disturbing, the source adds. And they could prove to be the straw that shifts custody to Kevin!” and her lawyer also had enough and quit.

September,2007:

• The VMA’s performance: No, the crowd definitely wasn’t saying “Gimme More”. I bet MTV regretted hyping Britney as the surprise performance and opening act after that fiasco:

ok, this wasn’t actually Britney but can you really spot the difference? You’d have to watch to look twice

• Also breaking news on the custody battle front, Britney temporarily lost custody of her two kid. It was about bloody time!

Oktober,2007:

• Yet another wise decision: the pop tartlet lost her kids: “L.A. County Superior Court Judge Scott Gordon issued an order today stating that Kevin Federline, the boys’ father, “is to retain physical custody of the minor children on Wednesday, October 3, 2007 at 12:00 PM until further order of the court.” What about her dogs though? PETA tried to step in.

November,2007:

• Eat It, Lick It, Snort It, F–k It, enough said. Britney’s new album “Blackout” was released and despite her personal “difficulties” made it to #1. Now isn’t that a great role model for today’s teens… and what we’ve learnt from Britney is you don’t have to be smart, or have any talent, or stay off booze and drugs and can still make it to number 1 in the music industry. Fabulous!

• Britney’s also having troubles completing simple tasks like answering her phone, not driving over people’s feet or her court ordered drug tests.

But hey, it’s only December… another whole month for Britney Spears to shock us and make a complete fool out of herself. Somehow I have no doubt that she’ll come up with great entertaining stuff.